I Was Being Selfish

When I started going to classes and practice circles to improve my psychic/mediumship skills, I was wicked selfish.

I was more concerned about being right, and not looking stupid, than I was about helping the person I was reading (“the sitter”).

My intention was all wrong. I wasn’t coming from a place of service; I was coming from a place of fear and ego. All of my Spiritual Teachers, in one way or another, told me that.

Being an incredibly self-conscious, type A person, who was practicing Law at that time, putting my ego aside didn’t come easy to me. By making the reading about me, I got in my own way and blocked the flow of information from the other-side.

When you’re worried about whether or not you’re right, instead of just delivering the information, I would JUDGE it before I delivered it, IF I said anything at all.

More often than not, when I withheld info or an image (I’m primarily clairvoyant), it was something that someone else in my group got and said to the sitter and it was the thing that meant the most. I was always kicking myself for not just saying it.

My mentors would tell me: “Step-aside;” “You’re just the conduit;” and “it’s not about you.”

Eventually it sank in and I was much better at getting out of the way, but it was something that I constantly had to remind myself to do. Being hyper-critical of yourself and worried about what others will think is a bad combination.

When I did readings from a place of service, they were always more powerful.

Now that I’m thinking about it, I was like that as a lawyer too. I was always worried about how good or smart I seemed. I was always worried about what the opposing attorney thought. It made me incredibly nervous to negotiate with them, and that was my job. Again, my intention was all wrong.

Ego is a funny thing. I do believe we need the Ego, at times, while here in the physical world, but it has no place when doing things for the benefit of someone else.

Even when I started my online business at Modere, I started with the wrong intention. Although I loved, and wholeheartedly believed in, their products, I was worried about how many customers I had and what rank I was achieving. Again, I wasn’t coming from a place of service.

And, again, I had to remind myself that it’s not about me.

It’s about helping people improve their health and wellbeing.

It’s about helping people make money working from home and fitting work into their lives, not scheduling their lives around work.

It’s about showing up as my imperfect-self and delivering information that will benefit others.

It’s about being of service.

No matter the work I’m doing, it’s become abundantly clear to me that my life’s purpose is to be of service to others.

If there’s anything I can help you with, just say the word.

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